Third Thanksgiving

To mark the second year of my life in the dirty South (I arrived on Thanksgiving morning of 2013, which seems like ages and ages..  Such a divisive trip. Hardly anything had split my life so distinctively), I thought it would be appropriate to count my blessings / say the words of gratitude in English.

Remember when putting your relationship status up on Facebook was a thing? Me & Nashville (Tennessee / America) would clearly be 'It's complicated'.

As in, 'it's great, but not the forever kind of great' complicated. Those little things that made you fall for each other back in the days are still there, such as compatible playlists and the smiles 'that only camels  can understand'*.. They tickle your fancy just the same. But you know that it's not eternal.

However, as The Little Prince taught us, being ephemeral (the opposite of eternal) does not make something less epic or beautiful. Quite the opposite: if anything, it will magnify the beauty and impossible lightness, for you know it will be gone. 

Still reading?=)

In no particular order, I am deeply grateful to Nashville for the following things:

1. My job. Deserves a separate rant, but if you are still in touch with me you probably noticed that it's all I'm talking about. That's my biggest win in life so far second only to my Greencard. I am excited to show up at the office daily and equally excited to work from home. Because I can. This job really brought out the best in me, I developed certain qualities I never thought I possess. There are so many amazing things I learned about life and how to get things done that are, speaking in American terms, absolutely magical. I learn new things daily (daily, guys), I am constantly challenged, and, as in any virtuous circle, I am challenged.. to challenge myself, you know? It's like a whole new level of awesomeness. I can't believe Google is cooler than us as a workplace.  I am so loyal that I say 'us' whenever I speak about Bernard. I also feel a tad sorry for anyone who can't work here, just to learn what it's like.  
2. Material / financial aspect of life in the States. I now have a whole Apple garden, iPhone, Mac Air and countless iPods (OK just two=) (I even bought myself an iPad, something I swore I'd never do. Never say never! And you know, I just did it. Went online and ordered one. Something that wouldn't be possible in Belarus). It is a deep deep subject, but the main maxims are: (a) people will find themselves struggling everywhere, and making yourself financially comfortable is no joke in the US (b) however, definition of 'financially comfortable' in the US differs tremendously from Belarus or Hungary. As the old joke goes (actually it wasn't a joke, it's a lose quote from an actual interview of a French family when the crisis of 2008 hit), 'We do feel the impact on our income. We now have to eat in 5 days a week' (c) therefore it's very easy to start taking all the material wealth that you are exposed to in the US for granted and embark on (my personal) favorite line  about how money can't buy happiness. I still believe in this super deeply. Yet, I think it's very important to recognize and appreciate the fact that when I shop for plane tickets these days I don't always pick the cheapest ones anymore. Or I can buy as many bananas as I want, I don't need to count them. Or that I can buy myself a new pair of shoes if I want to any day of the week, or two pairs** The good thing is I don't want so many shoes anymore because money can't buy happiness, even if it is shaped like a shoe. (d) But let's be realistic, when buying shoes is as stretching as buying a car (I'm exaggerating, but not too much) and almost a struggle (you don't just go and buy them, you try to find a friend who will go to Italy or to Vilnius, give them the money for the pair you like at the risk that the shoes won't fit... It's a struggle) it can  (and it will!) make you pretty miserable. So, I guess material wealth works in 'Ratchet effect' manner: you will be miserable without it, but it has limited ability to keep up your happiness level. So my point is that the US has saved me from the misery, and I can have my shoes. Just the shoes, mind you guys, I never wanted a Porshe. 
3. Since this list is compiled in no particular order, I'm only getting to it now, but I SAW ROLLING STONES AND PAUL MCCARTNEY. Quite possible it would have happened elsewhere, but it happened here. I was high. I also saw Gogol Bordello, The Decembrists, Modest Mouse too. I am also dipping my toes in Motown heritage, but that's almost a whole separate subject (deep-deep, as always), but you must check it out (Sam Cooke! Or just type in 'Motown classics' on youtube). It's the music you've always known and liked but didn't know it's called Motown and that it comes from the Bible Belt (does it come from the Bible Belt?=)
4. When it comes to foreign languages, sky is the limit. I'm super grateful that life here challenges me, there is an infinite universe of words I still don't know, slang, colloquial and business stuff. I can feel the rusty wheels inside my head spinning and turning. A poor analogy  here, just to give you an idea, would be the recommendation to swim in cold water if you are trying to lose weight because your body will be burning calories by just trying to stay warm. So, your brain is challenged even if you speak about sports ... or food.. or gossiping.. or any other dumb subject (interestingly, it's going to be challenged particularly brutally if you talk sports because sports slang is impenetrable to me. I might have better chances discussing neurolinguistics. In fact, I know I have better chances discussing neurolinguistics). One tiny downside of this linguistic paradise is that I sometimes feel that my Russian is not as sharp as it used to be, which makes me really sad. But still. I'll be forever grateful to Nashville for enabling me to put 'decent English' on my CV.
5. More of the same: I took up Italian here, so living my dream in a way. I couldn't do it in Hungary as there were no classes for non-Hungarian speakers. My Italian is really really poor (in fact, I'd never say that I speak Italian if I still lived in Europe), but relying on local standards I still went ahead and put Italian on my CV, just to reward myself.  Thank you Nashville and thank you Viviana. I know you are reading=)
6. Viviana deserves a separate paragraph. I don't want to make this post more personal, but without her and a few other people things wouldn't be as rosy. We bonded over Beatles, and historically it's proven to be the strongest bond. My biggest fear when moving has always been to end up feeling alienated and alone and like a stranger. So that was really important, to form a 'Team Me', no matter how small. So I'm grateful. 
7. Biking. Me biking to work whenever it doesn't rain (which is 80-90% of the days) is seminal because this time last year all I could do was to slowly bike around Bicentennial park and yell at those unfortunate pedestrians in front of me because I could barely zigzag ('barely' actually means 'I couldn't do it at all'). A month prior (October 2014) I couldn't get on a bike, start moving, and the only way I could stop myself was bumping into some object and falling on the ground. I feel I'm still a rookie (this is probably why so many people signal to me while I'm biking), but I'm definitely living my other dream, which is getting around by bike. I don't know if I look impossibly sublime like all those fantastic European bikers that had been inspiring me, but I know I'm a lot happier now. Also, it's interesting. Nashville quite literally forced me to bike because my aversion of cars is so so so high that biking had gradually crystallized as the only alternative, so who knows when I'd finally learn hadn't I moved here. Had I still lived in Budapest I'd possibly be relying on my feet and BKV to meet all of my transportation needs. Also, the other day at a street light a lady driver told me, 'You are a brave lady!', and we chatted while the light was red. We exchanged brief but warm wishes of happy Thanksgiving. Would it be possible if I was driving? Definitely no.
8. I'm grateful to Nashville and Tennessee for my favorite season, which is Autumn, lasts and lasts. Impossibly hot and terrible and humid summers are awfully long, too (4-5 months of dead heat wear me out!) But the on the flip side, Autumn here, with different cohorts of trees changing colors in turns, slowly-slowly, not in weeks, like at home, but for 2-3-4 long months, and really mild winter (which I wouldn't mind being frosty and snowy! I miss snow!!!) yeah we like it. It's now Autumn, end of November, and it's bright and sunny and crispy with just a hint of frost every other morning, and I like to entertain the thought that it will last forever.    

   

   Centennial park with the exact replica of the Greek Parthenon

   
   
   

   

   More of Centennial park and leafage

9. My neighborhood. The concept of neighborhoods is a lot more developed in American cities, so it's important to choose wisely. I didn't choose to live in East Nashville deliberately (interestingly, it's not really in the East, more North, strictly speaking), but I ended up here, and just like with my job, I feel like I hit jackpot. When I had to move from another area (arguably also one of the nicest areas to live) I had a small but non-negotiable set of criteria, and there was this apartment building that met them all. Decision process took about 2 hours, but the coolest thing is that it will soon be a year, and I still love everything about my apartment, its location, and the area. Every morning I wake up and think, 'What I nice place I have!' (OK not each morning, but it happens regularly) I am discovering little gems daily, and at the pace at which East Nashville is developing it's super easy (unless I'm staying in, which is often, but even then I have a crazy nice view. I don't how how it works, but I can see both sunset and sunrise  (so strange...), and it's an eye candy, to watch either (I let you infer that I wake up before the sunrise, like Gwyneth). I will probably write a separate post about how East Nashville might easily be the perfect area to reside in Nashville for someone like me.  It's the perfect combination of urban

   

   Urban

   

   Urban. It's the Capitol building on a gloomy October day

   and this special American suburban (what you see in the movies, houses with mailboxes and driveways, decorated yards for Halloween and Christmas, twinkle-twinkle lights.. Sometimes people plant herbs and leave a note that they are up for grabs),

   

   Suburban

   
   

   

   Suburban - 2

   it's close to downtown,  lots of bikers (possibly the biggest number in the city, but what do I know..) I can walk or bike anywhere, there is even decent public transportation (by local standards), and last but not least guys, there is ALDI! I probably should have started with Aldi. There is also Climb Nashville (I haven't climbed in almost a year, but I like to think that it's there for me if I need it), a crazy community center with a terrible gym (I'll explain later=), a park and a school that both remind me of Harry Potter Academy (never read or watched Harry Potter, but I imagine it just like this),

   

   Harry Potter - looking academy in the back! With a large stadium in front of it

   a lot of breathtakingly beautiful flora (especially now! And OK Spring is beautiful too)

   

   Breathtaking flora

   , there is a Portuguese-looking church, there is a library (I still haven't visited but I WILL!), there is the best bakery in town, and the best burger place in town right down the street, an impossibly expensive food store that sells organic angel tears straight from heaven,

   

   The store with food straight from heaven

   lots of bars and live music venues, my favorite ice-cream shop (Jeni's for life), the bike shop with most helpful staff, and the farmer's market and my favorite park in town is just across the bridge. And I could write on, which I will! I'm really lucky, really grateful. 
10. Some other skills I learned and things I've tried and trips I've taken. It might have happened elsewhere, but Nashville will remain the place where I tried climbing (I climbed diligently for almost a year, and plan to re-embark in 2016), yoga (I'm not a crazy yogi mind you guys, but everyone is obsessed with yoga here it's impossible to stay away. I think it's good for you. Not as in 'I'm always elevated and feel so much energy' kind of good, but I like to do 5-10 minute Tara Stiles every morning). I've tried white water rafting and canoeing (once, both). Haunted house. Hockey game. Boxing class (once, it was really hard!) American football game (I'm pretty sure it was American football). I saw beerstand and I'm pretty sure I was involved in tailgating. Then there is American Thanksgiving and Christmas, which are experiences for a foreigners. There was Chattanooga, Oregon, Niagara Falls, Cincinnati, New Orleans, Jack Daniels distillery, Charlotte (I drove 8 hours by myself, which qualifies as a skill. I'd never driven for more than an hour), Brazil... Life abroad will keep you amused, and that's one big pro.   
11. This point circles back a little to the second point, but I still wanted to make it a separate paragraph. America is the land of abundance. You can buy anything, and there is also a service for anything, and a special device or technique that will enable you to do things better, faster. Just like the other 10 points, it's a deep deep subject. We like to make fun of Americans that they have no idea how most things work because they pay the others to do it for them, or buy it from someone while in Belarus you want to be jack of all trades, both when it comes to physical tangible labour and (especially) intangible services like law, banking, and medicine, because you trust no one and you want to verify everything. I'm exaggerating in attempt to get my point across, but that's pretty much how it works. I digress though. I feel like I'm really lucky because here I have zero problems buying anything. Amazon Prime keeps my inner consumeristic beast satisfied, and delivery is only 2 days, you don't even need to leave your apartment! Price can be prohibitively high, but if you really want some special chocolate from Belarus, or Zotter, or toroncini, you can have it. Since food is my No.1 priority in life, I feel lucky that it's so easy to buy stuff like organic coconut oil, raw organic cocoa beans, goji berries, bee pollen, and all such crazy angel food meant for celestial bodies (just kidding, I don't eat goji berries. I actually had them once in Oregon, straight from the bush!) There is a real hunt after them in Belarus / Ukraine / Russia, and stuff that is so accessible here is a coveted treasure back home (for example, Quacker oats is sold as a delicacy in a very fancy foodstore in Budapest. And Yogi tea! Don't forget Yogi tea! Priced like gold). But really, just down the street there is an enormous store selling a gazillion types of flour, 87% of which is gluten free. Chickpea flour, white rice flour, wild rice flour, organic or non-organic chia / flax seed flour, coconut flour, and the list goes on. One of my favorite things to do when I came to the US was strolling between aisles and just staring at this abundance (I don't do it anymore, because I started in 2007=) haha. Imagine herds of second-year students from Eastern Europe spending hours at Walmart in the wilderness of New Hampshire. Hours, I'm telling you, 4 to 6 times a week). I come from the point in space and time where we had 1 type of everything: one bread (OK, two, we had black and white. Even three: black, black with carawai seeds, and white) One cheese ('cheese'). One milk ('milk'). One kefir ('kefir'). One chocolate ('chocolate'. I think I was 10 or so when there was also white, dark, and 'pore-infused') So yeah it feels good to know that you can buy a Mick Jagger T-shirt, a Mumi Troll poster from Finland, Turkish hazelnuts (they also call them filberts!), a pair of Ortlieb panniers, any book (in English. You might need to hunt for a Russian-language book, but it's not futile), an Obagi serum, L'Artisan Perfumeur perfume... Anything, with door-to-door delivery within 48 hours. It feels so great that I scaled back on spending tremendously. My 20-year old self would not believe it. Strengthens the point about how humans want things they can't get, and weakens the point about insatiable appetite. My appetite for the material is nearing satiation point. 

Now it's time to eat turkey, because it's Thanksgiving!

* After 'The Great Gatsby' the movie came out, a lot of people read the book. I couldn't find that one quote that I really liked on Google to just copy-paste it, but thankfully I wrote it down in my notebook (Moleskin, mind you) when I read the book in San Francisco in 2009: 'Over her shoulder the front part of the camel looked at the back part of the camel - and they exchanged a particularly subtle, esoteric sort of wink that only true camels can understand'. One of the most subtle passages about falling for each other slowly but irreversibly.
** But also returning merchandise in the US is super easy so you can order 10 pairs and return them all, haha.